Respect the Queue!!!

So I am beginning to realize that major shopping in Bangalore is centralized to specific locations. If you want to buy clothing here then a good place to go is Commercial Road. Very similar to the SP Road that I spoke of before. However it did seem a little less hectic probably because I was not actually looking for anything to buy. The amount of stores is staggering. There are a variety of tiny shops no bigger than a one car garage next to larger department like stores. At night everything is decorated with bright lights that it almost resembles Michigan Ave at night. It was actually a cool experience and of course you can haggle over price at every single store.



Commercial Road is not the real reason of this post though. After we had finished shopping we decided to catch an auto-rickshaw (metered-fare motorized rickshaw) to go home. It was late and pretty busy so finding an empty auto was difficult. Thankfully there was a traffic cop that was managing a queue for people wanting to get an auto. The line was pretty long but enough autos started to appear and quickly the traffic cop placed the waiting people into autos. The Queue Nazi ... eh... traffic cop seemed to be very strict and efficient in maximizing the amount of people to ride in an auto. Also he was brutal, yes brutal, in his enforcement in regards to the sanctity of the queue. I will get to the brutal part in a sec.



I have found that people here really do not respect a well formed line where you wait your turn based on when you arrived. FIFO (First In First Out) has not really caught on much here. We were in a Citibank one of the first days of arriving in Bangalore and we were amazed to see a mass of people swarming a lone female bank representative. It was total chaos but she seemed to work it like triage. It was actually impressive. If you are not comfortable with being pushy and loud then chances are you will never get serviced at many places here. It is not really too bad once you get adjusted. I still, however, find myself being way too polite when it comes to getting service and people push their way past me. Obviously, these people are oblivious to the imaginary queue that I have formed. I think sometimes you just have to give people a quick shot to the kidney to get to the front if you want to be served. Well, maybe a kidney shot is a little harsh but a good kick to the shin or a goosing usually distracts them long enough to slip through.



Anyway, seeing an actual queue especially out in the open like this was like seeing Bigfoot or UFOs. I almost told Suzi to grab the camera and take a picture but I was afraid that as soon as I said that the queue would disappear. Maybe I could have sold the picture to Weekly World News to go next to the latest Bat Boy story. So now the brutal part...



For sake of the story and to shameless plug a ridiculously excellent TV show, I will from now on refer to the unknown traffic cop as Vic Mackey. So Vic spotted what appeared to be an auto-rickshaw driver soliciting some evil people to cut the queue. This was a double offense because not only were the passengers violating MY queue, which this time was not imaginary, but the auto driver was also cutting his own rickshaw queue. The rickshaw driver was about find out the penalty for disrespecting the queue and crossing Vic Mackey. Vic marched over to the auto and screamed for the passengers to get out. They quickly leapt out and faded to the background as if they knew something wicked was about to happen. Mackey then politely asked the rickshaw driver never to do that again and let the guy go on his way.
THE END...





Yeah right, Vic grabbed the driver and delivered three lightning fast blows to the head. At first I did not really realize what I just saw. It is not everyday that you see someone get beaten. I dismissed it as my imagination until Mackey emphatically said in Hindi or Kannada what I can only imagine was not so very kind words. All throughout the verbal abuse he inserted random slaps. Maybe Vic was using each slap as a replacement for punctuation.



Order was restored and the rickshaw driver waited his turn in his line to properly pick up the next available passenger. The integrity of the queue was preserved that day thanks to the tireless efforts of that rouge abusive traffic cop. Thanks to him maybe one day queues will be common place here or at least you will see people carrying video cameras. I wonder if I could hire him when I go to Citibank again?



And NO, I do not approve of police brutality in any form. It is a vile and disgusting abuse of authority... unless someone tries to jump my damn queue then it is a welcomed deterrent and punishment. RESPECT THE QUEUE!!!