It is hard to quit Smoky

I have sad news to report concerning Smoky, after more than a month of trying to make her a part of our family we finally came to the realization that it just wasn't working and we didn't foresee any change that was going to improve the situation. We had tried everything; drugs, behavioral therapy, and homeopathy but nothing was getting us even close to a sustainable peaceful existence. We thought that maybe the homeopathy was helping with Smoky's urination and spraying issues, but on Friday I came home from work and brought Smoky in the kitchen with me so that I could do dishes (she still couldn't be left unsupervised without making a mess or being picked on by Mira or Chaya) and she went right to the corner of the kitchen and peed. I looked up to see this but also noticed that Mira and Chaya were lying at the door to the kitchen, blocking Smoky in. Even if Smoky wanted to use the litter she couldn't, because Mira and Chaya just wouldn't ever leave her alone. I realized that even if we could prevent Smoky's urge to spray and urinate, she still wouldn't be free to get to the litter box in peace. As more than a month of exposure to Smoky never reduced Mira and Chaya's stalking and attacking Eric and I could not believe that they ever would accept her and just leave her alone. Homeopathy was suggested to us for Mira and Chaya also to reduce their stalking of Smoky, but we did not want to drug every cat on the house just on the off chance that it might work. Before Smoky came to our home Mira and Chaya were fine so we felt that it wasn't right or fair to them to put them on medicines to fix the problem that we created by introducing her into the home. When we adopted Mira and Chaya we took the responsibility to make and keep them healthy and happy and I felt that we were failing them and stuffing them full of medicines would be a breach of those responsibilities on our part. On Friday night Mira also attacked Smoky and that was really the final deciding factor, enough was enough. No one was happy or relaxed, Smoky wasn't as she had developed these spraying and urination problems and was constantly being stalked, Mira and Chaya weren't as they were jumpy and on edge all the time, and Eric and I weren't as we were also on edge and not able to do really anything since Smoky required such close monitoring. It was a difficult decision and we hated to make it, but once we decided to return Smoky to her former home and owner Pami, we felt an enormous sense of relief and peace. I had spent the previous month crying so many times from despair and stress but after the decision was made I haven't cried a single time. I feel that this is an indication that we made the right decision because I just don't feel badly about it, it is the best decision for everyone involved. We took Smoky back to Pami Saturday afternoon and she happily hopped out of her basket and was greeted by a couple of Pami's cats. There was no hissing or fighting, just sniffing which was already an improvement from the scene at our house. Smoky didn't seem to be bothered a bit which was wonderful to see and Pami was happy to see her back in her home and was sure that she would be just fine and happy there. When we returned home we set about cleaning and trying to set everything back to normal, retuning bedding, pillows, stuffed animals, curtains, rugs, toys, carriers, etc. all to their original positions. Over the course of the more than a month that Smoky was with us our house was transformed to try to accommodate her and though we hadn't noticed as it was quite gradual, it had become somewhat unrecognizable. The effect that removing Smoky and setting the house back to normal had on Mira and Chaya was immediate and wonderful. They are so much more calm, they are playful again and now we actually have time to play with them like we used to. We have time to cook and we can go out and not feel guilty that we have kept Smoky shut up in her room. As I said, it was a difficult decision, but for us and our family it was the right one. We are glad that we had the chance to be a small part of Smoky's life and we are truly sorry that it didn't work out but we believe that we did everything that we could do, but there were some things that we just weren't willing to experiment with on our Mira and Chaya.

I also want to say thanks to everyone who helped us out, either by giving me moral support or giving us suggestions on what else to try. Yasmine, Lalitha and Natasha were great in supporting me but also gave tons of great advice so thank you guys so much, I am so lucky to have found such wonderful animal-loving friends here in India (it took me moving to India to find Lalitha, though she is actually in SF). My parents and especially my coworkers were a huge source of support, I can't even tell you how many days I broke down in lab and were comforted by Neha, Gayatri, Swarna and Rachana. You guys are awesome and aside from having the opportunity to meet Smoky, the other wonderful result of this difficult situation is that I made a new friend (Natasha) and I was reminded how wonderful my friends and family are and how I can count on their support no matter what.